My Sha

My best friend has been banished to a little town called Tishamingo, Oklahoma. From what I understand, there’s not much there….not even a Wal-Mart, and those damn things are everywhere you look. No, she didn’t commit some heinous crime for which this banishment is responsible; she really kind of went on her own. Now, please forgive me while I regress. Shavon has always loved animals. For as long as I’ve known her, she’s been feeding stray cats and taking in lost dogs, she’s even been known to provide a temporary home for parrots or boa constrictors in between owners now and then. We were on the phone once at 3:45 on a Saturday morning after leaving our respective bars and I hear her stop her car, open her door, and coaxingly call “Come here little guy.” When asked what sort of mammal she was trying to tempt into her grasps, she simply responded “There’s a fox. He’s running around in the middle of the road.” My response; “Foxes are wild, he’s not going to come to you.” Her response; “I have to try to get him, he could get hit”, of course. Anyway, she’s just always been like that. Hit a person and she’ll laugh, hit an animal, and she’ll tear your head off (and she could too, she’s mean).
Because of her love for all things furry, and scaly, and even feathery, she wants to be a vetrinarian…or something like that. Marine biology mainly. She LOVES dolphins. I don’t mean that she thinks Flipper’s cute, this is something that rivals my obsession with Winnie the Pooh. She has two dolphin tattooed onto her skin…permenantly, and if ever I don’t know what to get her for her birthday, I make it easy and get her dolphin something. So, anyway, that is how I lost my best friend to the God forsaken state of Oklahoma.
I have to say now that my reason for writing this is that I really miss having a partner in crime. She has been there through every boyfriend, break-up, and drunken night of rolling down hills (long story) since I was 19 years old. I NEED her. She was the maid of honor in my wedding. She was also the first person to voice her opinion that I shouldn’t marry him as well as the first person to say “I told you so” when I told her I was filing for divorce (It’s really our way of supporting each other…I do it when she messes up too). I really, really miss her.
When I first met her I was actually a little scared of her because like I said, she’s a mean bitch, and I’m a Libra….lover of peace, ya know. She didn’t like me a whole hell of a lot either, but all of our misconceptions about each other were alleviated with one little bonfire party in the middle of a cornfield. We were attached at the hip from that night forth…and all because I couldn’t find anyone else to go to that party with me. I asked her out of desperation and I’m glad I did.
She’s a little weird…like me, and really mouthy. She has three tattoos total and piercings in places that I won’t mention because if I do and she reads this, she’ll beat me up (although if you ask her, she’ll show you). She has horrible taste in guys (also like me) and she curses like a trucker, but I love her anyway. She has great clothes that I used to borrow before my second closet was shipped to Oklahoma with her…sob….but I think I’m getting over that one too. But it really sucks that I have to drive ten hours just to see her, or when she is home, she stays in a hotel. I can’t call her up anymore to go drive by an ex’s house and spy for me or to go grab some food at Elder’s. I honestly don’t know what to do with myself now. I can’t replace her, because believe me I would be hard-pressed to find a new best friend who shares the mutual hatred for my ex-husband or her bad attitude. So what’s a girl to do? Just deal with it I guess.
Last time I talked to her, she was getting ready to leave for a camping trip in Mexico to check out all the international critters they have down there. Then, this summer, I’m going to hang out with her in Clearwater, FL, for a week or so while she’s doing a marine biology internship. For one week, I’ll have her back. We’ll get dolled up, go out on the town, flirt with an unbelievable number of guys then hit the fast food drive thru on the way home. We’ll be partners in crime again. All I can say is Florida….watch out. You’ve never seen anything like us and I can’t wait.